惱人的indecision有葯可治

加拿大都市网

SOURCE都市报

Decision翻譯為「決定」。

Have you made a decision yet?(你決定了沒有?)

Indecision的釋義為a wavering between two or more possible courses of action ,不是不能做決定,是不能爽快地作決定,即優柔寡斷、遲疑不決。「議而不決,決而不行。」政府行動緩慢,重大事情上裹足不前,就會被人用這句來批評。2001年,當時的國務院總理朱鎔基就這樣督促董建華政府。

Decisive是形容詞,意思是having or showing the ability to make decisions quickly and effectively,即果斷的,這正是「議而不決,決而不行」的反向,而「議而不決,決而不行」,就是indecisive,not able to make decisions quickly effectively,遲疑不決。

面對問題,indecision後果可以很嚴重。Indecision即是拖延,拖延通常的結果是令問題加深。面對機遇,遲疑不決,大好機會就會錯失。這點大家其實都明白,但為什麼會經常indecisive,或起碼在某些事情上會indecisive呢?

在不同情況下,indecision有不同原因。最常見、但又不重要的一種決定,就是去什麼地方吃晚飯。Kimberly Key在”Uncovering hidden causes of indecision”一文中解釋:”In the case of dinner decisions, there are a number of reasons that cause people difficulty in articulating(清楚表達) what they want to eat.”

First, the options(可能的選擇) are plentiful. So plentiful that it can flood people and leave them with heightened uncertainty. Too many options leads to indecision. On top of that, people can appear to be indecisive when they are trying to please the other person. When both people are trying to please each other, it can be a perpetual(無休止的) ping pong game with each person repeatedly replying, “I don’t know. What do you want?”

這種其實無關痛癢的決定,減少選項會較容易作決定,別再你估我、我估你,坦白說出心中所想也是個辦法。

但在很多重大事情上,造成indecision的原因就不同。

優良紀錄 懶作決定

Too many options can flood someone, yet their inability to choose may be directly tied to their fear of making a mistake. This is exponentially(呈幾何級數地) increased if they have had a history of being corrected when they were making a choice – or always being told what to do and what to want. Both extremes create self-doubt(缺乏自信、自我懷疑) and the inability to connect to one’s own inner guidance.

Extreme是極端的情況。可能是因為你以往作的決定都是對的,這可以成為包袱,令你害怕今次會錯,破壞了優良紀錄。另一種情況,是從來都是別人替你作決定,你沒有作決定的能力。

若indecision是因為”fear of making a mistake”,那可以試試把作錯決定的後果寫出來,看看是否真的承受不了,清楚怕的是什麼,就可以理性地解決。

Many people who have trouble making decisions tend to over-analyze(過度分析、想得太多). There comes a time when no matter how much information you have, or how much logic you’ve applied, the decision isn’t going to get any easier.

Pros and cons的清單不能無了期做下去,若最後仍拿不定主意,可能就是因為正反理據旗鼓相當,要打破困局,不妨用最後一招:flip a coin(擲硬幣)了事!

學點如何作精明決定的招數,長遠會有幫助,可參考Richard Thaler和Cass Sunstein的Nudge: Improving Decisions About Health, Wealth, and Happiness。

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