英语学习:放弃还是不放弃 这是一个好问题

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Winners都懂得smart quitting

Quitter is a person who gives up easily or does not have the courage or determination to finish a task.

Courage是勇气,determination是决心。或是缺乏勇气,或是决心不足,遇上一点阻力或挫折,quitters就会做他们最常做的事:quitting——放弃、停止、辞职、退出、离开。Quitter就是经常半途而废、虎头蛇尾,轻易放弃工作或职务的人。

所以说:Winners never quit, and quitters never win.(成功的人永不言弃,虎头蛇尾的人永不成功。)因此我们都不愿做quitter,希望自己有persevering(坚持不懈)的能力。

“不浪费”原则

但凡事无绝对,有些情况最佳的选择却是quitting。Stephanie Lee在New York Times的文章”Sometimes you have to quit to get ahead”中就谈及quit还是不quit的问题。文章的副题是:”Winners are just people who know when to quit – and do it often”(成功人士只不过是那些懂得什么时候放手,且经常这样做的人)。

她引述The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches You When to Quit (and When to Stick)的作者Seth Godin的话:”… winners are smart quitters who quit often, like when they realize their current path and decisions cannot get them any farther toward their goal. Cutting their losses allows winners to reallocate(重新分配)their time and energy to the things that do continue to move them forward, he said.”

Godin称这些为smart quitters(聪明的放弃者)。这种”quitter”发觉正在走的路不能带自己到达目标,就会放手。Cutting your losses解avoid losing any more money than you already have lost。Cut losses指的不只是金钱上的损失,也可以是时间、精力或情感上的损失,而且这类损失往往比金钱更严重,继续走没好处的路就不要再走,这就是smart quitting。
令我们不想放手的其中一个原因是所谓的”‘don’t waste’ rule”。排队30分钟,但不知仍要等多久,不想waste已经花了的30分钟,但到最后可能浪费更多时间,继续排队或是离开,确是很矛盾的心情。

A paper in the American Psychological Association pegged it on our overgeneralization(过度应用) of the “don’t waste” rule. That is, we feel like we should put those 30 minutes to “good use.” But refusing to abandon(放弃) those investments can be costly. For every moment you double down(加注) on something that’s not working out, you are forgoing(放弃) other potentially valuable opportunities.

“放弃”怎么取舍

Northwestern University的研究显示︰”when we discard unrealistic goals(不切实际的目标) and switch to alternate(其他的、替代的) goals we’re happier, physically healthier and less stressed.”这是需要smart quitting的核心原因。

难处是分辨什么时候quit,什么时候坚持。Melanie Pinola在”How to know when it’s time to quit”提供的一个建议:

With any situation, you have to take the bad with the good. But if your experience is overwhelmingly(压倒性地、无法抵抗地)negative for a long period of time, you have to consider leaving or some radical(基本的)change.