忙里偷闲是impossible feat?

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每个人每天都在跟时间竞赛,时间表排得密密的,找一分钟松弛都难。为什么会这样?社会风气是主要的因素。

Armament race解军备竞赛,你有一个核弹,我要两个,敌国见你有两个就会把nuclear arsenal(核武)加大,如此争逐,结果大家的武器就愈来愈多,同被庞大的军费压得透不过气,两败俱伤。

国与国之间如是,人与人的心态也是一样,你的孩子上一个补习班,我的孩子不比你多上两个,考名校怎够竞争力?在工作间,你做10小时,我不做够11小时怎能争取升职?结果如军备竞赛,大家每天所有时间都在办公室度过。

无意义竞争

很多人都可能觉得被这样的社会氛围压得透不过气,朋友见面也经常互吐苦水,说工作怎样辛苦。这种生活方式就是所谓的”rat race”。

Rat race直译是“老鼠竞跑”,即指︰a way of life in which people are caught up in a fiercely competitive struggle for wealth or power,是为名为利,被困于营营役役、你争我夺的生活方式。 The term is commonly associated with an exhausting(令人精疲力竭的), repetitive(刻板重复的) lifestyle that leaves no time for relaxation or enjoyment. Rat race就是紧张的竞争活动、无意义的竞争。

但现实就是这样,难道真的潇洒“辞工”归故里,反朴归真,到乡下享受舒闲的田园生活?不过孩子怎样?家庭怎样?种瓜养鸡,自给自足,发梦也是可以的。把生活方式完全改变不切实际,但改善生活质素是有方法的。

Perfect是完美,perfectionism是完美主义,什么事要做到perfect,一天30小时都不会够用。 “The key to avoid burning out is to let go of perfectionism.”心理学家Marilyn Puder-York说︰”As life gets more expanded it’s very hard, both neurologically and psychologically, to keep that habit of perfection going.”
她建议:”… healthier option is to strive not for perfection, but for excellence”(较健康的选择是精益求精,而非十全十美)。 “Limit time-wasting activities and people”(别花时间在不重要的人或事之上)。做法是:

First, identify(辨识) what’s most important in your life. This list will differ for everyone, so make sure it truly reflects your priorities(优次), not someone else’s. Next, draw firm boundaries(界线) so you can devote quality time to these high-priority people and activities. From there, it will be easier to determine what needs to be trimmed from the schedule.

衡量重要性

Brian Tracy和Christina Stein在Find Your Balance Point: Clarify Your Priorities, Simplify Your Life, and Achieve More还强调priorities。

要更彻底改善生活的起点:”The starting point of designing a wonderful life is for you to develop absolute clarity about who you are and what matters to you.”(把生命中事物对你的重要性,必须弄得一清二楚。)这样才可实在地规划生活应该怎样过,把时间放在什么地方。